


No one left to live for

by Zearay



Series: You're the only one I love [1]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Don't know what happened to me, First EXO fic, How Do I Tag, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Short and depressing, Wanted it to end, but kept writing, i cried
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-14
Updated: 2016-06-14
Packaged: 2018-07-15 02:27:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7202576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zearay/pseuds/Zearay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He felt numb. He couldn’t cry, not even if it was for his best friend. He couldn’t feel anything; no pain in his chest when his heart beat, no sorrowful darkness clouding his mind, no grief threatening to swallow him whole, drowning him in the feeling of emptiness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No one left to live for

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Themuffinbanana](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Themuffinbanana/gifts).



> Geez, I haven't written in so long. Half a year maybe? I can definitely feel it. But here ya go, my frind. I published the piece of trash that I call a fic. Now if you will excuse me while I go sit in a corner and cry.

He felt numb. He couldn’t cry, not even if it was for his best friend. He couldn’t feel anything; no pain in his chest when his heart beat, no sorrowful darkness clouding his mind, no grief threatening to swallow him whole, drowning him in the feeling of emptiness.

He hadn’t been prepared, hadn’t even given it a thought at all. He felt weak, suddenly glancing up at the blue sky. How ironic. Such a sad event and yet the sun was shining, as if it was a wedding and not a funeral he was attending. His best friend’s funeral at that.

He couldn’t move. He didn’t even react as his boyfriend took his hand, intertwining their fingers. He only looked up, when he felt Chanyeol giving his hand a light squeeze. And then he started crying, tears flowing down his cheeks as he embraced the only person he would trust with his life, as the other laid buried underneath the grey tombstone.

He felt Chanyeol wrap his arms around him, holding him tight and rubbing soothing circles on his back. It was hard for Chanyeol too. Kyungsoo wasn’t only Baekhyun’s best friend. Chanyeol had been just as close to him as he had. How could he stand there comforting Baekhyun, when he should be breaking down, falling apart just like him? How could he hold another human together, when he should be devastated by the death of their mutual best friend?

“It’s okay. I’m still here. I’ll always be here, right by your side. I promise,” Chanyeol mumbled, his face buried in Baekhyun’s hair.

“So did Soo, and see how it went him. I can’t stand losing you too, Channie. My heart would break; I’d have no one left to live for. Please don’t die, Chanie,” Baekhyun cried, sobbing into his boyfriend’s shirt as he was pulled even closer.

“I won’t die, Baek. I won’t leave you alone. I’d never do that, and you know that. I’d never hurt you,” Chanyeol answered, kissing the top of Baekhyun’s head, resting his chin on top of his soft locks.

Baekhyun nodded quietly, snaking his arms around Chanyeol’s waist and grabbing onto the fabric of his shirt. Chanyeol just held him close, letting him cry on his chest as he whispered words of comfort into his hair. He would kill himself if he lost Chanyeol as well. He wouldn’t have anything left if he died, leaving him alone, an empty shell with no one to live for. Kyungsoo and Chanyeol were the two reasons he woke up every morning. But now one reason had left him in favour of joining his boyfriend wherever he was. A place faraway from the living, far away from the depressing reality that was a human’s life on Earth.

He had been devastated when Jongin died, not even making it to the hospital after the car crash. At that time, it had been Baekhyun who had comforted Kyungsoo, staying with him till late at night, watching wild life documentaries to avoid thinking of Jongin and his damaged body. Jongin, fighting to breathe one last time and uttering a simple “I love you,” before taking one last glance at the boy he had vowed his life to.

Kyungsoo had cried. Even more than Baekhyun cried for Kyungsoo, when he found him on the bathroom floor, an empty bottle of pills in his cold hands. He had known how much Kyungsoo loved Jongin, but he was not ready for a second funeral so soon after. He had not been emotionally stable enough to handle finding his best friend the same night, they had just said goodbye to Jongin.

He was gone. Kyungsoo had followed his boyfriend to the afterlife, not being able to bear the sadness. He had been broken, unable to let go. And Baekhyun would have done the same, if it hadn’t been for Chanyeol. Chanyeol was basically the only thing left, that kept him alive, gave him a reason to keep breathing.

He wanted to kill himself as well, but he couldn’t leave Chanyeol alone, broken to a million pieces. He wouldn’t hurt him like that. Just like Chanyeol wouldn’t hurt him by leaving him behind. They couldn’t afford it. They only had each other left.

Chanyeol gave Baekhyun a soft pat on his back before letting go and taking his hand instead. Baekhyun looked his boyfriend in the eyes, giving him a sweet peck on his lips and mouthing a silent “ thank you,” not trusting his voice to speak properly.

Chanyeol simply smiled at him, drying his eyes with his sleeve and dragging him back to the car. They had decided to move away since their friend’s were no longer there, trying to start over somewhere else. They had found a nice little house in a little village far away from cities and civilization. Peace and quiet, time to rebuild their lives and heal their broken hearts.

**Author's Note:**

> So... This happened. It's the first non-fluff fic I've ever written and english is not my native language, so please feel free to correct any mistakes. I'd love to get some feedback (as every author does), so do comment what you think. Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it (which doesn't even make sense, because this was painful to write)!


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